If I could say anything to my narcissistic ex-best friend it would be...
Thank you for this last year of friendship, overall, I have learned a lot. Despite the fact we barely spoke or saw one another, the distance has made me gain a different perspective. So, thank you for teaching me these five valuable life lessons. Honestly, I feel content - I just want to celebrate the mantra that people who come in your life always teach you something. It’s never a coincidence. I’ll probably never see you again, and that’s okay. But the lessons you taught me will live forever.
1- Friendship is 50/50
In any relationship, especially friendship, it’s all about being equal. If someone only talks about their life, interests, and their aspirations. Then, this friend does not take interest in your life, your interests, and your aspirations. There’s no support or no trust. That's not friendship at all.
2- How you treat people can have a large impact on their self-esteem.
It’s important to listen to what’s happening in your friend’s life. Everyone what’s to feel important to someone and to have someone that’s not going to judge them.
3- Loving your own company is crucial
The importance of loving yourself is so significant. This has been the greatest lesson I have learned. When you determine your worth and start loving who you are, everything starts to look different and you begin to feel less lonely.
4- Pick your friends wisely
This goes back to the whole idea of loving yourself. I think this quote basically sums it up, "If you don’t love yourself, you’ll always be chasing people who don’t love you, either."-Mandy Hale. When you choose your friends wisely, you’re protecting yourself, and who you surround yourself with will contribute a large part of your happiness.
5- If someone speaks negatively about a “friend,” they'll speak the same way about you to someone else.
If someone claims they are friends with "Sue" and then gossips about "Sue" on a regular basis. This is a friendship red flag. Just because they gossip to you doesn’t mean you’re safe. The chances are this person talks about you the exact same way or worse to someone else.
In the end, it sucks to lose a friend, but when a friendship becomes toxic - it’s time to leave and move on.