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Dating: 5 Things You Should Avoid

Dating is a fun way to get to know someone in a different setting. Meeting up privately allows each person to talk freely and be themselves. Dating also allow people to help decide if they wish to form a relationship with the person or walk away and let it go. Whether you're on your first date or your tenth, you'll want to avoid the following things. You want to make a good impression on someone and feel relaxed. You also want to enjoy yourself at the same time. If you're heading out on a date, there are a few things you should be aware of before you leave and once you get there.



Not Paying Attention to Personal Grooming


Your personal grooming can say much about you. When you're heading out on a date, you want to prepare all aspects of your personal look before you leave. This starts with your choice in clothing. You want the right undershirt, such as one from Underfit, that helps you look slimmer and also helps your clothing fit better. For women, you, too, want to pay close attention to the details of your personal appearance. If you're dressing up, you want to wear makeup that is applied well. You want to put on hosiery without holes and heels that fit comfortably. Men should also make sure that the clothing they wear fits. Jackets should not gap and pants should ride up. Personal grooming sends a message that this is a special occasion, and that you care about the person you are dating.


Choosing the Wrong Venue


Like real estate, location can be everything in a date. If you're choosing the location, you want to think carefully about your aims. A bar can be very noisy and make it hard to hear the other person. On the other hand, a bar can also be ideal for a short meeting and nothing else. A movie gives you something to talk about but you'll have to wait until it's over to talk. A formal restaurant is ideal if the relationship is serious and you're thinking of proposing. A more casual place is perfect if you're doing something else that day and you want time for other things.


Keeping the Cell Phone With You


Yes, your cell phone is your connection to the outside world. But there's a time and a place for it, and a date isn't it. Leave the cell phone at home. Your date deserves your full attention. If you can't bear doing so, bring it but keep it off. You can run the bathroom to check it if it's really an emergency.


Way Too Much Oversharing


In the age of Google, it's very easy to find lots of information about someone. When you're on a date, assume the person you're dating has at least done some research about your life. You don't need to tell them everything right away. Now is the time to find out if you feel comfortable in that person's company; it's not the time to spend hours talking about all of your thoughts and feelings - in short, don't dump your emotional baggage out on the table all at once. Try to keep the conversation as light as possible. Your date doesn't need to know all the embarrassing things you've done since you were seven. Focusing the conversation on your awkward moments and deep secrets can make your date feel uncomfortable. Let the other person talk. Keep the oversharing for your BFF's and your mom.


Speaking About Your Ex


No one likes to be compared to another person. No one wants to go on a date and feel as if there's someone else there with them. You need to avoid conversation about any other romantic relationships you've had in the past, or even (especially) the present. If you have an ex-husband, it's best not to speak about him, especially if the relationship is acrimonious. Even if you've just ended a relationship and you're feeling sad, to let it go. When you're out on a date, keep your focus on one thing and one thing only: the person at the table in front of you.


For more on the 'Do's and Don't's' of dating check out either (or both) of these books:

I Suck at Relationships So You Don't Have To: 10 Rules for Not Screwing Up Your Happily Ever After, by Bethenny Frankel, or

Dating: Men's Do's and Don't's, by Alex Johnson

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